Heiss M3

Ricers - How about this definition:

"All to often I see cars driving around and I can tell IMMIDIATELY by the look of it, that wether or not they knew it, the owner wanted ANOTHER car but could only afford the poor “bastard-of-a-bolt-bucket” that he/she is driving now.

It’s been modified to an ungodly state, and possibly even gone so far as to have been made to look like the car the owner REALLY wanted in the first place.

Ultimately, looks like 5 pounds of shit, in a 4-pound bag.

This is just one of the components that make up the look called “RICE”.

There’s that word… Rice.

Folks, Rice is not just driving/owning/modifying/rebuild/repairing an import.
Why do I get called a Rice-Boy just for driving an import car?

Me? Rice?
Who said that?!!

Certainly they weren’t talking about ME!

How can people who want to drive nice, strong, (import) cars, with true performance goals, avoid being lumped in with those that “RICE” their cars?

I have been DYING to quantify this term so that I can be held EXEMPT from it!

Well, it started with various racing modifications and show car “visual effects” that were produced for use in these arenas SPECIFICALLY.

Then, some people went about displaying these ”looks” on the street.
After all, the show car mods, lights, etc., looked cool and attracted attention in the tradeshow.

When it all started, these mods, were universally expensive and were produced & installed by very skilled people.
Some could easily be called artists, and this work would always cost lots of time and money.
(An example would be that neon would have to be cut, drawn, filled, and sealed by hand.)

Same with most any other appearance or performance “mod", all of the work, crafted by skilled hands.

Others saw a cool performance mod to a racecar, couldn’t afford the real thing, but could fake it.
(Out came the Bondo, fiberglass, wire mesh, etc…)

Now, you can buy cheap imitations of parts, scoops, fake disk brakes, and cheap fakes for the racing mods right off the shelf.

I have recently seen all the auto parts stores replace most or all of their performance part isles with all “APC” neon shifter knobs, sticker bins, fake carbon fiber radio knobs, LIGHTED EXHAUST TIPS, etc.

All designed to mock up something that your car just "isn't".

(I would never buy any piece of APC crap, but I would LOVE to own their stock!)

So, lets break out the definition of "RICE" as it is meant today by most that use the word.
In other words, modifications in the hands of a hormonally/mentally imbalanced “in-DUH-vidual”:

Rice = cheap, fake, gaudy (overly flashy)

Examples:

· TYPE "R" sticker on your Dodge Neon.... RICE
· Sticking one windshield wiper halfway up the windshield... RICE
· Do your “Gumby pants” make it hard to shift?
· Do you have scoops on your car that do NOTHING (like have no mechanical purpose)?
· If any of your “mods” involve intentionally hiding a similar, lesser part?
· If you have stickers that even most Asians don't get (or for parts you DON’T HAVE).
· An exhaust tip diameter 3 or more times your actual exhaust diameter.
· If you have “powered by (anything)” anywhere on the car.
· If you've spent more on stickers than you did on actual performance parts.

So often, I see people driving these CIRCUS FREAK VEHICLES, with tachometers bigger than their head, screwed to the dash with wood screws.

The shift light is working, but they’re in denial about the fact that their car is an AUTOMATIC!

And some cars have more lights on them than those ships from “CLOSE ENCOUNTERS Of The Third Kind”!

Meanwhile the next car drives by in the parking lot and I see the guy peering through the letter “O” in the HUGE “Honda” logo taped diagonally across most of his window.

FREAKSHOW.


I have nothing against making your car look nice.
But as a rule of thumb, if its sold in the isle of an auto parts store, its bolt-on, mass produced, and designed to attract those that are trying to make their cars "pretty" (like a $10 whore is “pretty”), then forget it man.

This goes for those cheap chrome accessories for V8s and those fake braided hose covers too!
I’m not going to pretend that just IMPORTS are capable of being in this category.

Ultimately, I prefer to think of it this way...

Does your car say, "HEY, LOOK OVER HERE, Im HERE ITS ME HI HI HI!"
(Like a self important 9 year old walking into a room of other self-important 9 year olds.)

Or…

Does your car make people say, "Hey, did you see that car?"
Perhaps even, "what kinda car is that... That’s cool".
(Like walking, handsomely dressed, into an "event" nonchalantly, not caring what anyone thinks, but secretly you know you look good.)

You know, the kind of thing that makes you think of the car for a while after it’s gone.
When was the last rice car you thought of for an hour after you saw it?

I'm talking about "Flash-in-the-pan" vs. genuine style.

Is this making sense?"

-My Cousin from RX7club.com

myclone

Said it WAY better than I did..../\